Did you know that there are currently 33 million widows in India some as young as 5 years old? These widows often have to live in separate communities and have no rights to remarry and are often forced into begging. In the modern western world, where divorce is as commonplace as marriage (not that this is a bad thing as you’ll see below), we may have forgotten that for many cultures, the concept of a woman having only “one” divine right partner has serious physical ramifications.

Less insidious but no less limiting is the concept of soul mate when it comes to the idea of “the One.” As a person who has worked in the energy field for over a decade and having looked into the akashic records of many, it has always struck me as cruel and false to think that a person has only 1 soul mate in a lifetime. What if the person dies? A friend’s sibling is dealing with this concept now as he just lost his wife after three years of marriage.

If you believe in the concept of a soul mate, then I would guess that you probably then also believe in the concept of a soul. And if you believe in the concept of a soul, you may also believe that there is more to you than just the physical body, and if you believe that, then you may believe that there is a Source from which you were born. If you believe in a Source, what are the qualities of this Source? Is it limited in scope? Is it based in lack and fear?  Or is it infinite, abundant, an all encompassing unconditional love?

When I look at people’s paths, if the person is single, I see a plethora of options if the person is wanting a relationship. And I’ve witnessed others who have had multiple beloveds throughout a lifetime. It makes sense doesn’t it? If the Universe is pure abundance that there would be an abundance of possibilities for a mate? While it is romantic to think that the person you are with is the “one and only” you may want to question why do want to believe this idea?

For many people it has to do with the concepts of safety and security. There is often a fear that if there is an abundance of choice out there, then what if I choose the “wrong one”, what if there’s someone better? And then if you’re feeling insecure,“what if no one else will love me?”

But if you were to believe that there is only One, then you would have to deal with another concept, “what if this person is the One and they die? Or if you’ve yet to find your “One” then “what if I missed the boat?”

There is also this concept of Twin Flame, which is an even trickier premise. Here there is the concept that very rarely, a twin flame (the first split of the energy that became your soul and theirs) incarnates. Well, let’s suppose that this is true, and most people don’t have their twin flames on the planet. Does that mean that their relationships aren’t really “all that” or that they don’t have the chance to have a truly phenomenal, ecstatic love life?

I’m impassioned about this subject because I see too many women allowing fear to rule the reasons why they either stay in or out of relationship for too long. I see too many women missing out on having the time of their lives!

When we speak about “How your connection to the Divine will guide you to “the One” we are speaking about you coming into communion with the divine that is within. Once that communication is established, then ecstasy and an honoring of self is the norm. AND THEN any romantic relationship that is attracted in this situation is joyful beyond words. This is not to say that the relationship does not have contrast, life will always provide contrast as it is THE active ingredient in all of creation. However, the more you are able to maintain that connection to the true joy that you are, the easier it is to attract and maintain relationships (of all kinds) that are rooted in love, expansion, self expression, and delight.

All my love,

Bella

HAVE YOU EVER FOUND YOURSELF singing a song over and over and over again,
especially one that is emotional, during a break up maybe?

It’s cathartic, allowing us to fully feel and express our emotion before we choose
to move and release it to the Universe. Right?

Well, it depends on how you use it.

One of the largest breakthroughs I’ve had in understanding the Law of Attraction
has been around re-framing what emotions are and how they work.

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression, “don’t be so emotional”, or “get a grip on your emotions”, or that women are “overly emotional.”

During my childhood I was always labeled as overly emotional, but now I’ve come to understand why that was, and also how once you understand the true nature of Emotions, your emotional sensitivity is actually your largest asset!

As it turns out, emotions are not creative.

I repeat EMOTIONS ARE NOT CREATIVE.

The beliefs that underlie an emotion are.

Emotions are simply INDICATORS.

They indicate what you believe about a particular subject.
And what you believe is what you attract into your experience.

At a recent Abraham-Hicks workshop, someone asked them “what is thought” and “what is thinking”. The answer was that “thought” was an offering of vibration and that “thinking” is simply what happens when you focus your attention on a thought long enough that it starts to attract like vibration or thoughts to it. There really is no process of thinking, there is only focus and magnetizing.

So how does this relate to feeling? Let’s say your lover just broke up with you (which you did not want) and you try to understand what happened. You start to think, “I don’t want this, I can’t believe he doesn’t love me.” As you focus on this belief, other thoughts like it start to aggregate, like “there’s something wrong with me, I’m too old, love is painful, etc. etc.” And hence the feeling of sadness, even depression comes about and you find yourself belting out Bonnie Raitt’s “I can’t make you love me.”

The emotional song just indicates what you are currently believing. And then, one day you find yourself sick of depression and revenge feels better than a forlorn song about losing a love. Why is that you think?

Because your belief is shifting. And believe it or not, if you started off feeling grief, revenge is actually a vibrational improvement, it is more empowering than depression. And anger is even more empowering than revenge.

This is not to say that one ought to stay at any of these beliefs for long or to take action on these feelings because they are still not in vibrational alignment with the truth of who you are, but rather that if Powerlessness/Grief are the bottom of our emotional scale (the point of most disconnection with the Truth of who you are), then you’ll know that you are coming back to life when you move up the scale from anger>discouragement>blame> worry>doubt etc.

In fact, using Abraham-Hicks Emotional Scale as a reference, I’ve  matched up various love songs to the different emotions so that  you can discover where are you vibrating when it comes to love.

Seeing what song you’re attracted to, you’ll see where you are at on the emotional scale.

And once you discover what it is, you’ll know what song to reach for next, because you’ll find that people can’t just jump from one end of the scale to another, the difference in frequency of vibration is too vast. However, you can move up incrementally, and you can even do it by listening to the songs that are right above where you are. Just make sure to GO UP THE SCALE!

ENJOY!

1. JOY- Love can move mountains – Celine Delion
2. PASSION Ain’t No Mountain – Marvin Gaye, Vision of Love, Mariah Carey
3. ENTHUSIASM/EAGERNESS/HAPPINESS  These Words – Natasha Beddingfield, You Send Me – Sam Cooke, My Girl – The Temptations
4. POSITIVE EXPECTATION/BELIEF – Unwritten- Natasha Beddingfield,
5. OPTIMISM – Kind and Generous, Natalie Merchant
6. HOPEFULNESS – Believe – Cher, Cupid -Sam Cooke,
7. CONTENTMENT – Don’t worry be Happy – Bobby McFerrin, Private Party – Indie Arie
8. BOREDOM – Are you having any fun?- Count Basie – Tony Bennett
9. PESSIMISM- What’s Love Got To Do With It- Tina Turner
10. FRUSTRATION/IMPATIENCE- Hung Up – Madonna
11. OVERWHELM – This Love, Maroon 5
12. DISAPPOINTMENT- You don’t bring me flowers-Barbara Streisand
13. DOUBT – Galileo – Indigo Girls
14. WORRY – Will you still love me tomorrow?
15. BLAME- Because of you – Kelly Clarkson
16. DISCOURAGEMENT – You’re so gay- Katy Perry, Love is a Battefield – Pat Benatar
17. ANGER – I will survive- Gloria Gayor
18. REVENGE – Before He Cheats- Carrie Underwood, Wake up Call – Maroon 5
19. HATRED/RAGE – You’re so vain, Carly Simon
20. JEALOUSY- Don’t cha – Pussy Cat Dolls
21.  INSECURITY/GUILT – If I never see your face again – Maroon 5
22. FEAR/GRIEF/DESPAIR/ POWERLESSNESS – I Can’t Make You Love Me – Bonnie Raitt

All love,
Bella

Bella Shing is a Spiritual Love Coach who helps people who believe in the Law of Attraction to Manifest their Beloveds by understanding first and foremost how to be that for themselves.

She publishes the monthly “Beloved Training” Ezine where you’ll get Tips, Resources, and Inspiration on how to be the Beloved all the time. Get your Free subscription at: www.manifestingyourbeloved.com

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